One thing is for certain: there are very few other 308-year-old men walking around out there. I daresay I may be the only one, unless there are some other time travelers lurking about that I am not aware of.
The Elvis Connection
(Although, I have been told, that there is a rumor that one 79-year-old king, who goes by the name of Elvis, has been known to make surprise appearances at odd times, which leads me to speculate that he may also be a time traveler. I've also mentioned him before, in one of my earlier blogs. What seems especially intriguing is the fact that King Elvis and I were born only two days apart... give or take a few centuries. Elvis was born on January 8, and I was born on January 6!)
In any case, the question of the day is: what shall I do on this glorious occasion? This experience of being in a future century is still so new to me, that on the one hand I am a little concerned about making a big to-do about it, for fear that it will all be snatched away from me at some unexpected moment.
On the other hand, I have always been one to enjoy some pleasant camaraderie, whatever the reason might be. If it happens to be my rare, inexplicable presence in 21st century America, so be it.
So, then, how shall I celebrate? I could meander out to the nearest public park in which there might be a cast iron likeness of myself placed conspicuously upon a ceremonial stone pedestal (otherwise known as a statue), and the two of us could carouse together, like brothers of a fraternity. Although, it would seem to me that my green, motionless twin might not be too lively a companion (unless he happened to bring along a few of his fine feathered friends!)
Another idea that occurs to me is that I could hire a horse and carriage and ride up to the tollbooth of the Benjamin Franklin Bridge in Philadelphia, where I could stop, fumble through my pockets, and attempt to find five dollars in small coins (preferably historic) to pay the toll, all the while commenting on the rising cost of travel (did you know that when the bridge was first opened in 1926, the toll was only thirty cents for a horse–drawn carriage?) Alas, the local constabulary would probably not appreciate that idea very much, and I could spend my birthday evening in the local jail.
Ah, I have it! I shall go to the local museum of science, where I can pull out my old kite, tattered as it is, and demonstrate for all gathered there exactly how it is that I once played the role of a latter-day Prometheus, capturing the power of electricity from the skies! And then, in a fitting reversal of that history-making event, I could send a digital re-enactment (you call it video, I hear) right back up “into the cloud,” to be stored somewhere, well into infinity (or so the acknowledged authorities of computer technology promise us!)
I do have to be careful, however, when attempting to recreate this event — as unpredictable as this electricity phenomenon is, I might just discover myself hastily dispatched back to the 1700s as an unintended side effect.
Your humble servant,