Then, a friend of mine took me aside and told me it was something called a “bullhorn.”
This was somewhat puzzling, because for the life of me, I couldn’t see how this could possibly be used to gather up bull hockey very effectively.
And then, as I had the opportunity to examine it further — turning it around and upside down, looking down its odd funnel-shaped throat, and checking out the various buttons on this unusual device — it all became clear. (Of course, as my friend came to my assistance once again, with a suitable explanation, I deduced the true purpose of this present.)
It’s an electric instrument to preserve freedom of speech!
My word! Well, this is something we can definitely use in the weeks and months ahead. For, as you all know, this country’s freedoms are really going to be put to the test after inauguration day.
And freedom of speech is going to be one of the most important things for us to fight for. As I once said a few hundred years ago, anyone who wants to overthrow the liberty of a nation starts by taking away the freedom of speech.
And let me add to that another quote, “all tyranny needs in order to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent.”
Now, as many of you may know from reading your history books, I wasn’t known as a famous orator in my day. Most of my speaking was in the one-on-one, conversational realm. But this “bullhorn” may change all that! I can easily foresee its use at upcoming protest rallies. Indeed, this will be very, very helpful!
So, what’s your stand on this? Are you with us? Are you ready to defend our democracy? Remember, as I also said a few centuries ago, “we must all hang together, or most assuredly, we will hang separately!”
Your humble (and newly amplified) servant,
PS: If you'd like to hear yours truly speaking to this same subject on Youtube, go to https://youtu.be/xRTjZ7buvAk